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© Penelope Lemov and Parenting Grown Children, 2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

© Penelope Lemov and Parenting Grown Children, 2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

I am back from the brink of a Facebook faux pas. Yes, I was about to drop a comment on my son's FB page–the page he posted that linked to a Russian version of a page of his.

On his post, he was wondering what all those Cyrillic letters added up to, but I
keyed in on his photo on the "Russian" page. His expression was–to a mom's way of thinking–too serious and kind of dour. I was going to tell him (in the most jovial way, of course) to lighten up–un petit sourire–for his
Russian ancestry.

Then, whew, I thought better of it. This is a page that his friends and acquaintances–including those he does business with–see. No matter how humorous or witty the wording, a mom's commentary, especially about his appearance, is a poor choice. Even inappropriate, given that he is a grown man using Facebook to interact with industry peers. It would be belittling to have his mom tell him in a public space to put a more welcoming expression on his face. Besides, how unwise of me to remind him that I am nosing around his musings and casting a critical eye. 

So I'll just say it here: un petit sourire. Or for those Russian ancestors: Немного улыбаться. He doesn't have to see it nor do his friends and–more to the point–neither do the people he works with.

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2 responses to “Social Media Etiquette: Their Facebook page and your big, fat comments”

  1. Shannon Avatar
    Shannon

    For adult children everywhere, THANK YOU for refraining!
    I’ve tried to keep an impermeable barrier between social networks – professional connections on LinkedIn, friends on Facebook – but I work in the arts where these lines inevitably blur. Therefore it was more than just socially embarrassing when my mother recently shared a joke about menstruation with a comment that she “hoped I was feeling better!”
    She and I have had many conversations about this sort of thing. I’m sharing your etiquette tips in a last ditch effort to stop the madness – I don’t want to have to block my own mother!

    Like

  2. penpen Avatar
    penpen

    it is so tempting for us [parents of grown children] to want to be part of the social media conversation that our adult children are having. But we need to edit ourselves–as your experience reaffirms. Thanks for sharing.

    Like

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