PenPenWrites

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© Penelope Lemov and Parenting Grown Children, 2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

recent posts

© Penelope Lemov and Parenting Grown Children, 2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

Category: gift giving

  • The Gift Gaffe: Tips on giving presents to our loved ones (and others).

    When she was browsing around her local bookstore, my friend Kathy found herself staring at adorable baby books and plush baby toys. She wanted to scoop them up and send them to her year-old grandniece whose birthday was in a few days. She resisted the scoop. Instead, she took photos of one or two books…

  • Bank of Mom and Dad: When is a loan a gift or vice versa

    Housing’s a bear for our kids who aren’t homeowners yet. If we offered a little help with the down payment, that might make a mortgage possible. It’s not just housing that’s causing angst. If we helped to pay off a car loan or covered their health insurance, that might ease their anxiety levels. When we…

  • Gifting and Getting: A wish list for gifts from grandkids

    The gift-giving mania of the Holidays is finally over for now. We no longer have to sidestep the occasional requests for what sort of present we’d like from our kids or grandkids. Except that it really isn’t over: Birthdays, Mother’s or Father’s Days and various anniversaries are still coming up. If a grandkid or grown…

  • Gift Giving: Bringing the warmth to cold cash.

    Young adult kids and teen-plus grandkids are well beyond the Toys for Xmas stage. The Holidays and birthdays bring more of a gift challenge. Could we possibly pick out a sweater or shirt that would be appropriate in their world? A tech device they don't have or we could afford? A book they would read?…

  • Grandparents and Holiday Gifts: Giving grandkids presents from our grown child’s childhood.

    Our social media feeds and retail websites are exploding with gift ideas for our grandkids–a dancing robot, AI Flying Orb, a remote-controlled spider. No wonder some of us are living a sentimental moment when we see in our attic or basement the adorable play kitchen our kids spent hours with or the 6-year-old-sized red roadster…

  • Gift Giving: Grrr. The frustration when a Thank You is not forthcoming.

    Gratitude never goes out of season and yet, when it comes to our kids and grandkids, acknowledging a gift may not be "on trend" for them or, as the French so stylishly put it, pas au courant. The formal, hand-penned Thank You note has become outmoded for younger-than-us generations but neither an email, text nor…

  • Money Matters: Great expectations on gifts for new grandkids

    A friend, C, called this morning. Distraught. Needing to vent. She was upset about expectations for a gift for a second grandchild who is due in a few months.  On a visit to her son and family over the weekend, C and her co-grandparent (D) had made an offer to their son and his wife:…

  • Money Matters: If there are strings attached to a gift, tie them on in advance

    Sometimes we surprise ourselves with our generosity. We give our children a large gift—–enough money to, say, buy a car, put a downpayment on a house or take out a first-rate health insurance policy. But then they use the money in ways we did not intend– they go on a lavish vacation or buy themselves…

  • Money Matters: Should a financial gift come with strings attached?

    We are a generation that wants to–especially if we have the wherewithal to–help our kids out financially. Whether it's a gift to assist with the downpayment on their first house or money to pay health insurance premiums, we're often very generous with our grown children. Whatever the reasons behind the gift, there is always a…

  • Money Matters: Can we control the gifts rich relatives give our kids?

    We're a protective species. When it comes to our kids, we want fair play in all things, even when it's only a matter of gifts from family members. Or maybe I should say, especially when it's gifts from family members and even more especially when those relatives happen to be rich. We may not want…