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© Penelope Lemov and Parenting Grown Children, 2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

© Penelope Lemov and Parenting Grown Children, 2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

Looking for some basic advice on weaning your grown kids from financial dependence on you? Two sources of friendly suggestions came across my screen recently. One is from Expert Business Source. The three main points:

1. Learn to talk to you kids about money unemotionally.

2. Create a schedule for them to become financially independent.

3. Focus on now. Whatever’s gone on (or not gone on) in the past, teach them now that they are responsible for their financial lives and
that you are there as backup, not as the everyday bank account.

A more elaborate set of help points comes from the Financial Planning Association. You can get the full version Here. The highlights, some of which repeat what the other Experts have to say, are:

Talk about your mistakes and your tough financial times, perhaps when
you were starting out, just as they are, and had only entry-level jobs
that barely covered rent and food, and couldn’t buy "luxuries" like a
television or new clothes. Sure, they’ll roll their eyes, but they’re
listening.

Make a plan for weaning them off your support; tell them the plan; and stick to it.

Bring in a professional advisor. Your child may be more open to listening to an outside professional than to you.

Some families establish trusts for their children in part to teach them
financial wisdom. For example, initially have the child meet
periodically with the trustee (which may be you) and the trust’s
advisor, if you have one, to learn how the trust is being managed and
why certain assets are invested in specific ways. Because it is the
child’s money that’s being managed, he or she should be more willing to
listen.

Some family trusts say a child can receive financial distributions only
if he or she earns a certain amount of money on his or her own.

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